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Archive for the ‘Behavior’ Category

Just a reminder – Going through rough shit doesn’t mean you’re weak, it just means you’re going through rough shit. If you feel overwhelmed, talk to someone. A counselor, a clergy, a friend, even me. It gets better, and it does improve, even if it doesn’t feel like it will right now. One year ago the world lost a comic genius to the devastating effects of depression. There is help out there for all of us, and it truly can and will get better. Please – Talk to someone. And worth repeating, the number for the suicide hotline in America is 800-273-TALK.

Let’s take care of each other.

Peter

Follow @petershankman on Twitter.

 

*As I am struggling myself, it does help to talk.

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The Clown’s Prayer

Lord, as I stumble through this life, help me to create more laughter than tears, dispense more happiness than gloom, spread more cheer than despair. Never let me become so indifferent that I will fail to see the wonder in the eyes of a child or the twinkle in the eyes of the aged. Never let me forget that my total effort is to cheer people, make them happy and forget at least for a moment all the unpleasant things in their lives. And, Lord, in my final moment, may I hear You whisper: “When you made My people smile, you made Me smile.”

—The Clown’s Prayer

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https://www.facebook.com/PeterShankman?fref=ts

I ask you to indulge me for a second and read this story.

In 1990, a kid who all his life was labelled as “different,” got into Boston University by the skin of his teeth. He spent the first two years of his college career hanging on by a thread, on academic probation all four semesters. By the time he got into his Junior year, he’d discovered writing and journalism, and graduated with a somewhat-not-terrible 2.8 GPA.

He had a few professors tell him that being “different” wouldn’t be helpful to him as he entered “the real world,” but he never seemed to change. One professor actually shook his head at this kid at graduation, no doubt amazed that he’d been able to walk the stage and get a diploma.

That kid took his “different” outlook on life, and applied it the best ways he knew how. He quickly realized he wasn’t cut out for a “traditional” career, and got fired from his first few jobs for “not fitting in.” Throw in ADHD and the inability to know when to shut the hell up, and this kid was pretty much the poster child for the society of social misfits.

In late October of 1998, with nothing else to lose, he started out on his own, first with a PR firm, then after selling that, as a consultant. Eventually, he founded Help A Reporter Out, and the rest, as they say, is history.

At 4pm today, that “different” kid is again going to walk a stage at Boston University, this time to receive a “Distinguished Alumni” award from the same school where he struggled to not flunk out, 24 years ago.

So I say this to you: DIFFERENT IS GOOD. Being different gets you REMEMBERED, not simply recalled. Being different is the best wish I could have for you, for your children, and for your life. Being different will get you everything you could ever want. Maybe not right away, but in time, without question. And if you know someone who thinks a little different, doesn’t fit in the same circles as everyone else, or who, as my mom always said “walks to the beat of a different drummer”, and who might be struggling with it, take a second and tell them that they’re doing the right thing, and more importantly, tell them to embrace their different ways of being – Because it’s only when we’re different, and not like everyone else, that we can achieve the greatness locked away within all of us.

This is a pretty awesome day for me. 24 years ago, I can tell you with 100% certainty that I never, ever thought I’d be about to get any kind of award for being me. Quite the opposite, 24 years ago today, I had my doubts as to whether I’d even see 2014.

Embrace who you are. Love yourself, and never, ever let anyone tell you that you’re less than anyone else, simply because you might be different.

Thanks for listening, my friends.

Love, light, blue skies, and long surfs,

Peter Shankman

http://shankman.com/

http://themistakepodcast.com/

Books by Peter Shankman on Amazon: 

http://www.amazon.com/s/ref=nb_sb_noss?url=search-alias%3Dstripbooks&field-keywords=by+peter+shankman&rh=n%3A283155%2Ck%3Aby+peter+shankman

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1- Things I’ve learned (picked-up), on Twitter:

  • If you want to start a conversation with someone, tweet it (text it, email it, etc) in a question form.
  • When anyone/friends want to hear from you, they’ll tweet ya (contact you).

2- I’m not well. At times I have excruciating back/nerve pain, mostly due to Tarlov Cyst disease. My situation in being on disability, having all my furniture/belongings in a storage facility, living temporarily with my mom in her small one-bedroom apt., and helping/caring for her— has put me in a dismal state.

I’m on my 2nd week of Zoloft (antidepressants), and already thinking— I may need a stronger dose.

I was told about:  “every relationship evolves.” Those two Bold words, depressed the heck-out-me. More so—who I heard it from. I just had to research.

“The relationship evolves and either grows closer or further apart.” This had me thinking & sad-as-hell. This friend knows about my pain, and knows what I’m taking for depression. Why was I told this? To hear the truth? Well, it’s true—the Truth Hurts!

Have you ever wondered, if others knew the real You, they would not be interested in You?

(me) 3 things to remember for a friendship relationship:

  • Loyalty/Caring
  • Listening
  • Trust

Humpty Dumpty once said, “I know you think you understand what you thought I said, but I’m not sure you are aware that what you heard is what I meant.” (Alice in Wonderland, by Lewis Carroll)

Source:  http://70030.netministry.com/apps/articles/?articleid=32538&columnid=3844

“A World Happiness Database study found that people with close friendships are happier.”

Source:  http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Friendship#cite_note-2

I feel, the only thing I did to be ‘Liked’ is ReTweet/Share, and Help.

This friend loves to make people happy. How come I feel worse? TIME HEALS. I’ll be okay. 🙂    

Note: I have a back illness, and I’m taking antidepressants due to so much. Be careful what you say to someone dealing with depression and be thoughtful, understanding, & caring. If you’re a friend, just be one!

Do Friends REALLY care?  Some do Not!

*Thinking* Are my conversations good enough? Are my interest? Am I good enough? 

A friend is someone who can see the truth and pain in you even when you are fooling everyone else.  -Unknown

Thank you for listening!

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Note:  First of all before I start— let me tell you— I may ramble but who should care; no one. Absolutely no one. Ellen Degeneres rambles all the time. This post may or may not be edited, but it’ll be Awesome. Why? Because it’s my blog, and I don’t give a hoot about criticism! 

TIPS. 

I worked at a salon for 14 years on commisson + tips. Salary also, but close to minimum wage (actually less than minimum wage).

The tip I want to write about is “Tips” / “Tipping”—

I received as little as change (coins) to as much as $10, $20, or $25 (it may be more, depending on the service).

I treated *everyone* the same, and gave each and everyone of the customers the same great job I did. The job being haircuts, hair-braiding, shampoo, haircoloring, waxing, and last but not least—nails.

In todays time, I see people working a little bit harder for those people that tip them the most. That, to me, is terrible— especially in this economy. And, in the area I am living in.

I would say the difference between ‘those people’ and I— is that I truly loved my job as a cosmetologist (salon worker). I was passionate about my work.

Taking care of *whoever* walked through the salon’s front door was a blessing.

One salon operator in specific gave a disgusted look when she saw a customer that tipped very little— come in to the salon.  Do you think this operator was busy? No.

I; however, was always booked. To make an appointment with me, a customer had to make it in advance.

Who wins? The nice, the courteous, the patient, the caring, and the passionate! 

*When one is doing well, and can tip 20% or more— do it. You’re helping the economy.

Though, when poverty hits and you no longer can tip that 20% you were once use to— tip whatever you can. Those that cannot tip extravagantly don’t go to high-end places anyway.

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Did you know that Autism now affects 1 in 88 children and 1 in 54 boys? This figure doesn’t even encompass children who are ASD (autistic spectrum disorder)…..Please go to Joey’s Dads Autism Walk 2012 page (URL below) and contribute what you can! Most parents with an autistic child wants is to hear an “I Love You.” Reasearch $’s are needed!

• Autism prevalence figures are growing
• More children will be diagnosed with autism this year than with AIDS, diabetes & cancer combined
• Autism is the fastest-growing serious developmental disability in the U.S.

• Autism costs the nation $137 billion per year
• Autism receives less than 5% of the research funding of many less prevalent childhood diseases
• Boys are four times more likely than girls to have autism
• There is no medical detection or cure for autism

The Donation Page of John Scott Falkenberg:                                                       [John Falkenberg is my nephew Joey’s dad.]

Click the link, or the photo to go to the donation page. Thank you!

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Several weeks back as I checked my unfollowers through whounfollowedme.com, I noticed someone who I was following and also was following… unfollowed. I remember when we started following it was because of “Toni-On-New York” (TV show). Anyway, I don’t usually do this with unfollowers (mostly because I don’t care, it’s only Twitter) but I just had to tweet the guy. Simply saying that he unfollowed, and thanking him (sarcastically of course). He then later or the next day tweets me back saying, “Oh it must have been one of your non-English tweets.”
[Note: If one of my tweets was non-English, it must have been a re-tweet because I don’t tweet in Spanish. The only time I do, is when I’m tweeting someone directly—or when I decide to say “Hello” in 2, 3, or 4 languages.]

This is not at all shocking to me nor new. I have always spoken to everybody/everyone. People don’t realize at first that I speak Spanish.
When I’m in a group, and someone else starts speaking Spanish I continue
speaking English as a courtesy for the others (one good thing I can say about myself, is that I definitely am not selfish—as I think about others always). However, someone else sees/hears me speak Spanish, and I automatically sense that they get a little annoyed.

Back when I was in beauty school which classes started every month, I
started with approximately 75% Americans. The following month—this one specific woman started, and since I make everyone welcome and comfortable in any surrounding I became friends.
My lunch group was the same but once they heard me speaking Spanish to this woman, they were—like jealous. They did not want me to speak Spanish.
Well to make a long story short—by the end of the 18 month course, there were approximately 6 less students which either transferred to another school or simply dropped out.

In reference to the guy on Twitter, I cannot really understand it because he’s involved in Social Media (his Ad was in the Blog World 2011 website). He’s also a dad. As influential as he *might* be to the social media world, it just doesn’t make sense.

Again, is this racist? In his case, especially that he said he stopped following because of a non-English tweet—I think it is racist—
1 – Because he’s from the East Coast, near me… and
2 – Because I *see* this a lot around in my neck of the woods.

I discussed this with my sister, and she had a good point. Another question—
Is it possible this person was influenced by the environment in which he grew?

If one uses TweetDeck as I do, one is able to translate most foreign tweets.
I, Isabel (@TypeRtist), am a Spanish speaker, but speak/write mostly in English. I understand (somewhat) Portuguese, and with the help of TweetDeck translate (or Google) will occasionally say hello in French, Dutch, Italian, etc..
Twitter is international, so it’s obvious there are going to be thousands of foreign tweets. A lot of people I correspond with directly in their own tongue also tweet in English.

So isn’t being friendly a part of Social Media? How is one “Social” without “friendliness?”

© 7/18/2011 by Isabel C. Alvarez

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